Saturday, July 1, 2017

Margariti's Morning March

Currently there are two of us in this group. I am the not-so-fluent Greek speaker, making up Greek words that seem like they should be in the language and Toula is a do-or-die, won't-stop-until-I-get-the-point-across, barely-able English speaker.

But we are both fluent in grunts, groans, eye rolling and gestures. Thus, our morning conversations are both enlightening and somewhat confusing.

All are welcome to join us! Young, Old, middle aged, male, female, Greek-speakers, English-speakers, non-speakers etc.
However. . . and this is a big however. . .

No dogs, please.

Why no dogs?
Here are 4 reasons:

1. 1962, First Encounter with a Dog: I was playing at Little Jimmy Sorkell's house in Hicksville, NY. His puppy, which to my 4-year-old mind was a ferocious lion, jumped up on me and started barking. I peed all over the kitchen floor. His mother said something like "You make more of a mess than fido!" and then she got me a pair of Little Jimmy's scratchy boy-jeans to wear while she laundered my clothes.

2. 1987: Margariti, Greece . . . My brother-in-law thought it would be a good idea to keep a ferocious man-eating dog outside the door of our small 2-room house. I was terrified all that summer, especially at night. What if the dog got loose? It never stopped barking. My in-laws tried to reassure me. The dog would never hurt one of its own, they said, which I found completely unnerving. That dog was trying to get at an unfamiliar scent: American. I barely slept a wink that summer.

3. 2007: Hauppauge, NY . . .  I was jogging through my neighborhood when a dog decided to give chase. His owner behind him on a cell phone was screaming "Fido, no!" which I interpreted as "Fido, don't kill that woman who is jogging ahead of us."  I, while running at the speed of light was screaming back to Fido's owner, "Is he friendly!? Will he bite?!" She, unable to process what I was saying, I'm guessing because she was alternating her screaming to the dog with talking on the phone, did not answer me. I went home and bought a treadmill and did not see the jogging-light of day for 4 years.

4. 2011: Hauppauge, NY . . .  We had house guests from Greece. I did not want to disturb anyone with the sound of the treadmill, so I took to the streets again. Half way around the block, a dog coming from an unclear location, was barking profusely which I translated to be: "I'm behind you and I'm going to rip you to shreds as soon as I catch you." I twisted my foot in a pothole and broke my fall with  my face and the road. Then I spent the day in the hospital emergency room and haven't jogged outside since . . . not in the U.S. anyway.

. . . so, please, no dogs. In fact, my plan is to get as many people around me as possible so that when a dog does approach, I can throw my fellow walkers into its path while I escape.

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  1. Oh Linda - I'm still laughing at your descriptions of your doggy encounters. :D

    1. I've had some scary experiences with Greek sheep-dogs - more like Molossian war-dogs!

    2. Haha. . . Good comparison Jim. I agree!

  2. You, Linda, are a true joy. Your writings bring so much good into my life and I thank you so much.